Manipulated Page 22

  Turning as fast as I could with her weight on my back, I saw that the psycho had awakened and was charging at Sammy. Sammy charged at it and was throwing punches like a freaking boxer, so I didn't worry until I heard more growling. It took me too long to realize the sound was coming from the poor young girl on my back.

  She pulled me to the ground and tried to kick me in my stomach, but I caught her foot and twisted it easily. She was smaller than me, so I was more annoyed at trying to save her than I was afraid of her attack. I tried to push myself up to my feet, but she came at me again, and I kicked her stomach so hard she flew away from me.

  "Mmm, tasty bitch."

  I turned around to find two guys with blood all over their clothes and hands staring lewdly at me. Were they on drugs too? But I pushed that from my mind. Four to two—those were not good odds. The girl psycho came at me again, grabbing my hair. I kicked her several times before she let go, but the guys were on me by then. One of them simply snapped her neck then tore her shirt off her and bit into her breast. I cringed and realized they couldn't all be on drugs—this just had to be the infection alone.

  "Does that turn you on, you little slut? You like that? See how he's eating her? I'm gonna eat you just like that."

  I shoved at him, but he was tall and three times my size. He fell back a bit, but came right back at me, smacking me across the cheek. It seriously stung, and my eye felt like it was on fire. He raised his hand again, and I kicked and shoved, but he stayed on me. I closed my eyes tight—and suddenly, he was gone.

  Struggling to get my eyes open, I could just make out another dark shape burying something shiny in the psycho's gut several times before he fell to the ground. The other psycho dropped the girl at my feet and charged at the dark shape as Sammy came over to me.

  "You okay, Risa?"

  I nodded, but I couldn't say anything. I kept my eyes glued to the dark figure. Was he infected? Would he turn on us the second he'd taken care of the psycho.

  "Come on, I need to get you to the car. Can you stand up?"

  I looked at him with the one eye that it didn't kill me to use. "I—I'm fine. You should help him. He saved me."

  "Damn right he did, Risa. It's his fucking job to save you. Now, let's get you in the car."

  I didn't connect the dots to what he was saying until the dark shadow had sliced into the last psycho's neck. It was brutal and frightening and such a freaking relief. "His job?" I asked just as the dark shadow stepped toward us and into the beam of Sammy's headlights… Brodie. My chest burned, and I shook my head back and forth. "You said—you said you'd come alone."

  Sammy put his arm under my shoulder and picked me up. "I'm sorry. I had to tell him. But I made him promise to stay away unless it took me more than five minutes to leave the parking lot with you. Sorry, Risa, but he's a better fighter than me."

  I didn't acknowledge any of what Sammy said, and I refused to look at either of them.

  Brodie came closer to me. "Sunshine, please. I'm so s—"

  I didn't need to psych myself up for this fight, that was for sure. I pushed Sammy away and shoved at Brodie, sending him flying back a few feet. "You can fucking go to Hell, you son of a bitch! How dare you use me and make me—you know what, you're not worth it. Stay the fuck away from me." I stormed over to Sammy's car and threw myself in the passenger seat.

  I don't know where Brodie went, and I successfully convinced myself that I didn't care. When Sammy got in the car, I stared out the window coldly. "I appreciate you coming to get me even if you did bring him. Please take me to my Dad's, and I'll decide what to do from there."

  "Risa, he's a jackass, but he's a scared jackass."

  "Sammy! I don't fucking want to hear it. Stay the hell out of my business." As tough and pissed as I sounded, my lower lip was quivering again. It took several breaths and several minutes to calm down.

  When we pulled into Dad's driveway, he came running out to me. He held me so tightly I almost wondered if he was infected and had super strength too.

  "You scared me to death, Risa. You said you wouldn't do that again."

  I didn't have anything to say, so I just let him hold me. On the porch, I noticed Grams and—I was suddenly seeing red again as my eyes fell on Brodie. As gently as I could, I pushed Dad aside and charged at the asshole. "Get the hell away from me!"

  He stepped forward, seemingly unafraid. "Not until you listen to me."

  "The disgust on your face said it all. Now leave."

  "It's not what you think. I—"

  I didn't know how to fight, and I had no idea how to throw a punch, but I didn't give a damn in that moment. I pulled back my fist and hit him in the face as hard as I possibly could.

  He staggered back several feet and shook his head a moment before coming back toward me. "Risa, please, I love you."

  Fuck that! My wrist hurt like hell, and it killed me to tighten it into a fist, but it was worth it to hit him again. I pulled back my fist, but Sammy grabbed my hand and pulled it behind my back.

  "Risa, you'll break your wrist like that. He's not worth it, honey. You wanna hit him again, let me do it."

  That surprised me enough to allow a few of his words seep into my irate brain. I could break my wrist. It hurt like maybe I had or at least sprained it. I stopped fighting against Sammy. "Okay," I said a little too gruffly. "I won't punch him again." He let me go.

  Brodie moved forward again. "Baby, I love you."

  I was wishing for some sort of martial arts training, but the best I had was a little training I'd been given in self-defense during PE. I turned to the side, put my weight on my bad knee and kicked him square in the stomach. Again, he flew back several feet, but this time, I took the opportunity to rush past him into the house, slamming the door.

  I stormed up to my room. He loved me? Oh yeah, sure, cuz nothing says love like being disgusted after sex. Nothing says love like being unable to stay in the same room with the other person. Nothing says—why did I care? I shouldn't care—I wouldn't care. He could go to Hell. I didn't care. I didn't care. I threw myself on my bed and curled into a ball with my "not caring."

  Scared as Hell

  A few minutes later, someone knocked lightly on my door. "It's Lara, Risa. Can I come in?"

  I didn't answer and glared at the wall, making my eye hurt. It was a good hurt though, much better than the pain Brodie left me with. I squinted again just to give myself something to focus on.

  "Please, Risa? I promise to leave the second you ask me to."

  She'd been a good friend. She never gave me any reason not to trust her. "Fine."

  She came in slowly and sat at the end of the bed. "I don't forgive and forget, Risa." She took a deep breath. "You don't know this, but my dad—well he and my mom sometimes—they use their fists first and talk later." She looked down at her hands. "Not just their fists. They get creative. Sammy and Brodie have sort of been saving me since I was a kid. Whenever my parents would drink or be in one of their moods, I'd run to Brodie's or Sammy's and hide there. I'll never forgive my parents or my older brother who turned away when they were—Anyway, I don't want you to think I'm saying this just because Brodie's my friend or I forgive easily. If someone hurts you, they deserve to suffer, but Brodie's reasons are solid, Risa. They suck, but I really think, once you listen to him, you'll at least feel better about what happened, even if you can't forgive him."

  "I don't want to look at him, Lara."

  She patted my arm. "So don't. Turn over on the other side and face the window. I'll make him sit on the floor with his back to the door. I'll stay right outside the door, and if you yell for me, I'll have Sammy come in and haul his ass out of here once and for all."

  "I don't want to hear his voice either."

  She kneeled on the floor beside the bed and looked me in the eye. "Won't you always wonder what he would have said? Do you really want your memories of your first time to be so horrible?"

  My memories of my first time were wonderful—it was
my memories of afterward that made me cringe in pain. Would I regret not hearing his reasons for treating me that way? No... Maybe—yeah, okay probably. "Fine. Two minutes, that's all, then bring Sammy in."

  She smiled with relief. "Two minutes. You got it. I'm just outside the door."

  I rolled over to my other side and could already feel the moisture gathering behind my eyes. Damn it! No crying, I scolded myself as the door closed again. I could hear him slide against to door down to the floor, and it took a lot of restraint not to throw something at him. I closed my eyes.

  "It turns out we were both virgins, Risa."

  I huffed at that. If extreme lies were all he had, this wouldn't take two minutes.

  "I've never made love to a girl before. I never really thought about it except I avoided any girl who got too into the idea of being in love with me. I've never—I didn't know—I mean I knew I cared about you, and I didn't want to lose you, but I didn't think—and when I looked into your eyes, I almost told you—but I was so—and then I was mad at myself. I shouldn't have walked away. I'm not making any sense, am I?"

  "No, you're not, and you're time's up," I mumbled, trying to hold the cold tone in my voice.

  "Risa, when I looked into your eyes, I fell so deep for you. I'm in love with you, sunshine, and it scares the hell out of me. Really, deep down, on the surface, and everywhere in between scares the hell out of me. I'm chicken-shit for running, and I'm pissed at myself for hurting you, but Risa, I love you. I've never—those words are difficult for me to say—my mom—I learned that love just means you're askin' someone to step all over you—giving them that power."

  Grams' words about being patient and about his mom came back to me. I wanted to know what his mom did or said to make him feel that way, and I felt awful for him that someone did that to him, but it didn't make it okay for him to do it to me. I didn't know that I believed he was in love with me. "Why?"

  "Why what, sunshine?"

  I glared at the wall. "What makes you think you love me?" He certainly hadn't shown it walking out on me all disgusted like he had.

  "The way you look at me, the way you bite your adorable bottom lip when you're trying to be tough and not smile, how smart you are, how hard you try to do everything on your own, how soft and sweet you are when it's just us—I love it all, Risa. I don't want to be without you. Please, sunshine? Just let me stay with you. You don't ever have to forgive me, just let me be with you."

  Tears fell quietly down my cheeks, stinging my swollen eye. He was a charmer with a million lines. What if this was all a line? Does it freaking matter? my brain shouted. He wants to be with you even if you make his life miserable. He already slept with you, so what else could he possibly be trying to use you for?

  I rolled over and didn't bother wiping the tears from my cheeks. He rushed to my side, kneeling close to me, brushing my hair away from my swollen cheek and eye. "Oh, Risa," he breathed out painfully. "Stay here, baby, you need ice."

  I tried to grab for him, but he was gone instantly, and I was left wincing at the stupid use of my right hand. My wrist was throbbing violently.

  He went to the door and asked, "Lara, can you get her some ice for her eye and her knee?" He looked back at me before calling out. "Wait a sec." He gently took my right hand in his. "Remind me to teach you how to throw a punch without breaking your hand. Can you move it?"

  I slowly, stiffly moved it around, squeezing my eyes shut and feeling the pain in my eye more intensely from doing so. I was a mess. "It just hurts, everything hurts."

  He kissed my forehead and went back to the door. "Three bags of ice."

  I could hear Lara ask, "Not that you deserve it, but you want some for your eye?"

  He looked down at the floor. "No. I'm fine." He came back and sat on the floor next to me, staring up at me. "I was disgusted with myself, Risa, for being too afraid to stay and deal with what I felt. You were—I've never been that overwhelmed before. It was all me, not you. You're perfect. It was perfect, Risa."

  I rolled my eyes. "I let you stay. You don't have to keep saying stuff like that."

  "It's the truth. I've never been with anyone like you before." He moved until his lips were just inches from mine. "I love you Risa Neely. Saying that scares the hell out of me and makes me feel so—I don't even know how to describe it. I love you. I don't ever want to be without you."

  The door opened, and I expected Lara, but instead it was Grams and Dad. Grams had a tray with something that smelled good—chicken noodle soup? I was actually pretty hungry since it had been several hours since my sandwich.

  Dad had ice. He turned on the light, forcing me to cover my eyes as best I could without actually touching my eye. Patting my calf, he said, "Lie on your back, so I can put some pillows under your knee."

  I did as instructed, and he put the ice on it. It was worse than it had been the last time I'd pushed it, but it wasn't nearly as bad as when I'd first injured it.

  Grams set the tray on the dresser and walked to my side of the bed. She smacked Brodie on the back of the head, hard. "Move it." She sounded angry at him. It almost made me smile. She held my wrist, pressing here are there and making me move it like Brodie had. "I'm not sure if it's sprained or not. She really needs X-rays, but I'm not letting any of you near the hospital with the quarantine in effect. Ice for twenty-five minutes then I'll wrap it up, and we'll repeat it again every few hours." She pulled a bright light out of her pocket and shined it at my eye. "This'll be fine, just keep ice on the corner of your eye here for twenty minutes on and twenty minutes off to reduce swelling." She turned to Brodie. "Let me see your stupid eye."

  "I'm fine, Grams," Brodie complained as she poked at his eye. With the light on, I could see a pretty impressive reddish-purple bruise beside his left eye.

  She raised her eyebrow and put her hand on my shoulder. "Nice punch, kid."

  The way she treated Brodie and complimented me told me she knew what had happened. Did Dad know too? I didn't want him to know we'd slept together. I mean, I wasn't a kid or anything, but I just didn't want him thinking I was slutty or something. But then I told myself to stop worrying about it. It didn't matter what other people thought. I still couldn't help but turn to look at him as he sat at the end of my bed.

  He patted my calf again. "I'll teach you to do it the right way, honey."

  "I already told her I would," Brodie admitted.

  "Well, how about this. I'll be the teacher, and you can be the punching bag." The anger in Dad's voice told me he definitely knew what had happened.

  Brodie hung his head. "Yes, sir."

  "Food and rest," Grams commanded as she brought the tray over.

  I pushed myself up with my one good wrist, but couldn't scoot back.

  Brodie sat on the bed next to me. "Can I help you, baby? Please?"

  I closed my eyes and had to let out a frustrated breath, but nodded. With one wrist, I wasn't making much progress on my own. When he wrapped his arms around my chest and picked me up, scooting me back to the wall, I just couldn't help wrapping my arms around his shoulders. Closing my eyes, it took a lot not to cry at the way it felt to be in his arms. I loved him so much even after everything.

  He held me tight far longer than he needed to. "I love you, Risa," he whispered. "I'll never let you go again, sunshine. Never."

  It took forever to eat left-handed. Brodie tried to get me to let him feed me, but I was not having it. The somewhat proud, somewhat amused smile on his face when I all but threw the hot soup at him for being overbearing reminded me of the list he'd given for loving me. He loved how hard I tried to do everything on my own, and it made me realize he'd been right about sex not changing me. I could have crumbled in his arms the moment he said, "I love you," but I didn't. I was still me. I still had a brain and some freaking self-respect. I wasn't a needy, simpering, wilting thing that begged for his attention. In fact, I still hadn't forgiven him. Part of me wanted to forgive and forget, but too large a portion of me screamed to be c
autious. I'd been burned and manipulated before—he had to prove himself this time.

  With a full belly, in my own room in Dad's townhouse, it was far too easy to fall asleep. Staying asleep, now that's where the problem was. I had nightmare after nightmare as my subconscious worked through everything I'd seen and done. My mind twisted the psycho Infecteds into what happened with Brodie. When he left his room disgusted, the psychos came in to rip my flesh off me piece-by-piece. When Sammy came to get me, Brodie turned psycho and ripped him apart piece-by-piece. The third time I woke up terrified, I had dreamt that I'd gotten back to Dad's only to have him and Grams rip Brodie, Sammy, and me apart.

  Brodie pulled me into his arms, but I pushed him away. "Risa, have I ever hurt you physically?"

  It might as well have been a physical wound he'd inflicted. It sure as hell felt like a gunshot to the chest, but it didn't hurt anymore, and I knew he would never hit me or anything like that. And he had saved me from the psychos. He put himself in jeopardy to save me.

  "I know you don't trust me yet, and that's okay. But you can trust me with your life. I'll always protect you and do everything I can to keep you safe. You at least know that, right?"

  I searched his odd green eyes. Emotionally, he could gut me entirely, but I really believed he would always try to keep me physically safe. Slowly, I nodded.

  "Then let me protect you. Let me hold you while you sleep. Trust me to keep you safe. If there's danger, I'll wake you up. I promise you, sunshine, just trust me."

  When he pulled me into his arms this time, I didn't push him away. It took a while to work it all out in my head enough to fall asleep again, but I didn't have any nightmares.

  It was light out when I woke up. I turned in Brodie's arms, twisting my knee a bit, but I was surprised it didn't hurt. Moving it even more, it felt back to normal, which was odd since it was usually stiff and sore for several days after an incident like this. Experimenting, I moved my wrist a bit, but the bandage was too tight to do much. As I tried to remove it, Brodie put his hand on mine, stalling me.